Life In Every Word
by Irish-Lass08
Summary: Ginny was curled up in a ball in her bed, her hand resting on the baby forming within her. This can't be happening, she thought. Her mind whirled as she tried to figure out what to do. Tell her parents? Tell Harry? No, no, she couldn't do either of those.
1. Chapter 1

** Disclaimer: ** Harry Potter and all that jazz does not belong to me. It belongs to JK Rowling. Also, the song Clark Gable, by the Postal Service, belongs to, well, the Postal Service.

**Life In Every Word**

**Chapter One**

_ I want so badly to believe  
That there is truth  
That love is real.  
And I want life in every word  
To the extent that it's absurd._

A stony silence lay over the graveyard, still except for the shivering breaths of a young girl before a grave. She stood above a blank tombstone in a dark cloak that flapped around behind her in the wind. Her hair, which occasionally seemed red in the moonlight, spun out behind her wildly, almost Medusa-like. The girl's face was as blank as the grave before her, not giving any clues or details. She had to work to get to the ground, as though she wasn't used to the way her body felt.

As she knelt before the grave, a mix of emotions now were visible on her face. Small tears poured from her wide, brown eyes down her cheeks, rosy from the cold. In her hands she held two single lilies, which she dropped before the plain tombstone.

Barely noticeably, she whispered, "I miss you."

The words seemed to hang around her, and she began to cry harder, ever as silent.

Suddenly, her face screwed up with what appeared to be pain. She opened her mouth and a deep, painful scream erupted into the still night. She fell backwards, her arms clutched tightly against her stomach. As she toppled to the ground, her robes fell back, revealing a large bulge beneath her arms. The girl was obviously very pregnant.

She began to cry as she held her bulge, trying to push herself up. Her arms were too weak, though, and she collapsed again. Her face now showed how much pain she was in as she struggled. She seemed almost blinded from the pain, and her screams and moans continued to fill the cold graveyard. No one was around to help her, it seemed, and after a long fight to stand, she gave up trying to get off the ground. Instead, she began to push herself back, away from the graveyard, using only her legs.

When she had at last moved away from her previous spot, it was clear that the ground beneath where she had been was wet. Once again, she let out another loud, terrifying scream, clutching her protruding stomach. This time, though, it seemed the pain was too much, and she couldn't keep her head off the ground.

The girl collapsed onto the cold dirt, her tear stained face revealing her intense fear. However, the second her head hit the ground, a tall man darted out of the trees surrounding the graveyard.

His hair was dark, nearly as dark as the night, and it stuck out at all ends. The moonlight glinted off his glasses, and deep emerald eyes were visible beneath them. His brave, defiant eyes now shone with fear and exhaustion as he ran to the girl swiftly. His feet barely made a noise as they touched the ground, and the girl didn't notice his presence.

Not until he knelt down by her and gently lifted her head from the muddy earth floor. She opened her eyes slowly, staring up at his face. A mixture of fear, shock, and relief played out on her features as she opened her mouth.

"Harry?" Ginny whispered, before collapsing into his open arms, her closed eyes blocking out the cold night.

---

Ginny sat in a bathroom stall, alone, crying silently. Her stomach still felt queasy, making her sure that she wasn't done throwing up. Sure enough, she felt the bile rise in her throat quickly. As she vomited into the toilet, she wondered if this was how it would always be. Throwing up alone with no one to hold back her hair. Never before had she felt so lonely.

She flushed the toilet and sat on the ground for a while, absorbed in her thoughts and tears. She was sure by now that she was pregnant, there was no denying it. The way she hadn't fit into her old dress robes this morning, the way she kept throwing up, the way she'd already been nine weeks late. Yes, Ginny was, in fact, pregnant. Only problem was, she didn't know what to do from here.

"Ginny?" A voice called into the large bathroom, echoing across the stone walls.

Ginny wiped her mouth quickly with toilet paper and flushed the toilet, standing up. "Yeah, Tonks?" she called back.

"Your mum sent me to look for you. She said you weren't 'mingling enough' by hiding in a bathroom stall."

Ginny sighed, pushing open the door. "I'm not hiding," she said sullenly.

Tonks looked at Ginny strangely. She looked as though she wanted to say something, but she held back. Ginny washed her hands carefully, waiting until Tonks wasn't looking to take a sip of water.

"It is your party," Tonks said, and now Ginny was sure she was holding back from saying something. "It's not every day you turn seventeen."

Ginny sighed again, drying her hands with a paper towel. "I didn't ask for a stupid party. I'm of age now, shouldn't I be involved in decisions like this?"

"Your mum just wants you to be happy," Tonks said, but Ginny didn't believe it.

"She doesn't know what I need to be happy! She thinks that by throwing me a birthday party and inviting every seventeen year old boy she knows I'll suddenly be happy. Like that will make me completely forget Harry!"

Tonks ran a hand through her short pink hair. "She doesn't want you to forget Harry. She just thinks you'd be happier with someone else, someone who's here..."

"No," Ginny said hotly. "She thinks that I'm just pining over Harry, that he doesn't care for me the way I know he does! She wasn't there that last day before he left, she didn't hear what he said to me!"

With that, Ginny was crying again. "He told me," she whispered now, her voice choked with tears. "He told me he loved me."

"Gin, I believe you!" Tonks said quietly, resolutely.

The tears continued to pour. "But you're the only one! Everyone thinks that I was just a fling for him, another Cho Chang... they don't understand that he loves me as much as I love him... I wouldn't be going through what I am for him if he didn't love me as well!"

Tonks looked concerned, but Ginny knew she already had figured it out, even as she asked the question. "What are you going through for him?"

"Oh don't act dumb!" Ginny spat. "This is the third time this week you've found me throwing up in a bathroom, and you were with me this morning when I couldn't get these damn things on!" she gestured to her too tight robes. "I'm pregnant, and you know it!"

Tonks didn't look surprised, but she looked worried. "Ginny, there are other options--"

"I am _not _getting rid of it!" Ginny had to work hard to keep her voice down. "I'm not going to kill an innocent child, just because I'm not ready to have it. I will have this baby, and if I can't handle raising it, I'll put it up for adoption. But I'm not about to kill it!"

"Ginny, just because you think this will bring you and Harry closer--"

"THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH HIM!" Ginny screamed. "I'm not planning on telling him, not until he comes back, and when he does, I will take full responsibility. I understand what this will do, and I don't want him to feel guilty. Not until Vol- Voldemort is destroyed will he know about this child, and even then, I don't want him to have to take any responsibility. I love Harry, I do, and he loves me. He'll understand that I need to raise him or her alone. Harry will understand that I don't want to force him into anything."

Tonks nodded. She grabbed a wad of paper toweling and gently wiped the tears of Ginny's cheeks.

"Let's get back to the party," she said quietly, and together, the two walked out of the dark bathroom.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer:** Harry Potter and all that other stuff that goes along with Harry Potter belongs to Jk Rowling. The song Clark Gable belongs to the Postal Service.

**Life In Every Word**

**Chapter Two**

_I was waiting for a cross-town train  
In the London Underground  
When it struck me  
That I'd been waiting since birth to find  
A love that would look and sound  
Like a movie_

A wand was held to Ginny's chest as she breathed heavily, her face scared and her movements unsure. Harry stood in the corner wanting to help, but he couldn't move. Dumbledore had cursed him so that no matter what, he couldn't twitch a muscle. He wanted to yell to her, to tell her not to fight, but he couldn't. She didn't seem to notice his lifeless figure in the corner, and he wondered vaguely if he had been disillusioned.

"Either fight or we kill her," Snape snapped, and Harry saw that the wand held to her chest was steady. Snape wasn't nervous. Harry assumed Snape had been talking to him, meaning that he could see him. But why couldn't Ginny? Or was she avoiding looking at him? She must be angry, probably because of what happened at Dumbledore's funeral. She hadn't wanted to break up, but truth be told, neither did he.

He tried to call her name, to tell her he was sorry. He was so focused on making Ginny look at him that it took a few seconds for what Snape had just said to sink in. _Fight or we kill her._ They were going to kill Ginny, he had to do something! But he still couldn't break that damn spell, his limbs were frozen. Why did Dumbledore have to charm him? Inside, he was screaming, crying, doing anything to get them to stop from hurting Ginny, but outside... he was numb.

"Fine, we'll kill her! Draco, do it!"

Harry then noticed Malfoy in the corner, his wand held in his hand, shaking out of control. He, unlike Snape, must be nervous. He didn't move at Snape's orders, but his eye's were darting all around.

"Draco!" Snape shouted. "DO IT! Do it or he'll kill you! He'll kill your entire family!"

For a fleeting second, Harry wondered why Snape was trying to help Malfoy. Wasn't Snape on their side? But wait, if he was on their side, he shouldn't be holding that wand to Ginny's chest. Then it all came rushing back to Harry... Dumbledore's tired body slumping slowly down the wall, pleading with Snape to save him. Snape's eyes, cold and dark, angry. And then Snape whispering the spell, the spell that made everything go wrong.

It had been Snape. Snape was the one who murdered Dumbledore. Harry felt a rush of hatred and anger surge through this veins, but not all of it was directed towards Snape. Some was directed towards Dumbledore. Had the old man been so quick to trust, so ready to see the good in everyone, that it had killed him in the end? Harry felt miserable, because he realized that now he truly was alone, and he needn't have been. Dumbledore could have prevented his death, he didn't have to trust Snape! The old man had been foolish, really, and Harry felt as though he had abandoned Harry just when he needed him most.

Still, however, Harry blamed Snape for much of the damage. Snape still stood there, calm and ready to kill the only woman Harry had ever gotten a chance to love. As much as Harry wanted to fight, wanted to kill that greasy bastard, he knew he couldn't. He still couldn't move, and it was killing him inside.

Snape's voice pulled him out of his thoughts. "DRACO! KILL THE GIRL! IT'S YOU OR HER THAT WILL DIE!"

Malfoy still didn't move, but tears were pouring down his terrified face. Suddenly, Moaning Myrtle appeared next to him, patting his back.

"Don't worry, Draco," she was saying. "If you die, we can truly be together."

Malfoy didn't respond to her, he just began to cry harder. Snape was glaring, Harry was still frozen, and Ginny shook, breathing heavily.

Then, suddenly, she turned her eyes directly on Harry. He looked back at her, but something was wrong. She wasn't acting normal, she wasn't acting as strong as usal. She opened her mouth to speak, but it wasn't her voice that drifted out.

"Harry, promise me you'll do whatever I tell you to," Dumbledore's voice said. She moved her mouth as though it was her saying it, but Harry thought it could have been Dumbledore just pretending to be her. But no, Dumbledore was dead. This wasn't right.

He didn't have time to ponder this, though, because the wand against her chest had begun to glow a deep red. Harry tried to scream out, to scream her name, to move and help her. But try as he might, his body fought with his brain. He couldn't do a thing but slowly watch her be destroyed.

"Promise me," Dumbledore/Ginny said, her eyes still on Harry, oblivious to the wand that was now glowing even brighter.

Suddenly, the dark tower they were in was filled with a sad, beautiful melody, as though it was Harry's very heart that was singing.

Then came a new voice, a voice that echoed throughout the room, but the speaker wasn't there. The voice was distant, and Harry couldn't understand what it was saying. He began to drift away from Ginny, even though he was still frozen. He drifted out of the window slowly, and as he looked around, he recognized the spot. It was the very place Dumbledore had fallen out of. For only a tiny portion of a second, he felt a wave of peacefulness pass. So this was how it would all end. This would be the end of Harry Potter.

Then, he was falling, falling fast. The ground was like a vast sea, coming at him faster and faster. He looked back up at the tower, and saw Ginny looking down at him from above. She looked sad, and she opened her mouth to speak.

"Harry, I'll never stop," she was saying, but instead of her voice being distant and far away, it was right in his ear. He stopped midfall and hung there, listening to her beautiful voice. "The world could be crashing down around me, and with my last dying thought, I'd wonder where you were."

Then he was falling again, and her face was gone from the window. The ground was rushing at him so fast, and he knew it would hurt like hell when he hit it. As he grew closer, he heard that voice he had heard from the tower distantly before, and he realized he could recognize the speaker, and then he understood the words.

"Harry, Harry wake up!" It was Hermione's voice, loud and clear.

The ground was a mere meter away, he was going to hit it.

"HARRY! It's just a dream!"

He blinked open his eyes and sat up, surprising Hermione, who had been leaning over him. She squealed and fell backwards, tripping over the bed that had been crammed into the tight little room.

Harry looked around, breathing a sigh of relief. He wasn't on the school grounds or in the astrology tower, it was just his old bedroom in Number 4, Privet Drive. The room was more crowded than normal, sure, but it was still the same room he had been forced to spend every summer in since he was eleven.

"Bad dream?" Ron asked with an attempted smile that looked more like a grimace.

"Yeah," Harry muttered, reaching up to wipe the sleep from his eyes. As he did so, he noticed that his cheeks were damp with both sweat and tears.

"You kept screaming Ginny's name," Hermione said as she got up off the ground. She looked worried. "Was it one of your Voldemort dreams?"

"No," Harry got out of his bed and began to pace in the little amount of space between the beds. "No, this was just a normal dream. But it was horrible."

He looked up at Ron and Hermione, who had stayed on the bed, still looking a bit frightened. They looked concerned as well, though, and Harry felt a rush of gratitude that they were with him. He didn't know what he would have done without those two.

"I can't stay here any longer," he said miserably, putting his face into his hands. "I need to kill him for once and for all."

"Well," Hermione said. "Your birthday's tomorrow. After that, we can leave." Then she added, with a slight smile, "And you'll never have to return."

"Yeah," Harry said, a grin forming on his face. "My last night in this damn room..."

"So where are we going tomorrow?" Ron asked, apparently wide awake now.

"Godric's Hollow," Harry said quietly. "I want to see my parent's graves."

Ron nodded, lying back down onto his bed. "Don't forget, mate, we have to take our apparation tests."

Harry looked away from his friend. "Er... about that..." Ron sat back up, alert. "I was thinking we could skip that. I mean, we know we can apparate! Why waste time getting some license?"

Hermione looked as though Harry had just proposed to kill her entire family. "Oh Harry, you can't be serious!"

"Er-- I am," Harry said, doing everything he could to avoid her eye contact.

"Do you really want to give the Ministry another reason to hate you?"

"Well, it's not like they'll arrest me! They want to get rid of him, too!" Harry thought he was making a good point, so he looked up at her.

"How thick are you?" Hermione spat. "We need the Ministry's help! We're going to need Aurors if an event occurs where we're outnumbered 20 to 1!"

Harry couldn't think of an adequate response.

"You'll take the test first thing tomorrow," Hermione said bossily. "After that, we can go to Godric's Hollow."

She laid back down on her bed with an air of finality. "And turn the lights off when you go to sleep."

Harry shook his head and Ron rolled his eyes before Harry flipped off the light.

---

Harry woke up around seven the following morning. The first thing he did was mutter a quick spell under his breath to turn on the lights. He smiled to himself, happy to finally do magic at the Dursley's without having an owl fly in the window instantly after. Ron and Hermione didn't wake up from the light, so he took a different route.

"_Accio _covers," he said, and their covers flew to him instantly.

Ron muttered something and pulled himself into a little ball, and Hermione started grumbling under her breath as she rolled over to look at Harry.

"Boy it's good to be of age," he said with a smile. She attempted a grin, but her face was apparently still asleep.

Slowly, Ron and Hermione rose from bed, rather crankily. They all got dressed quickly, Hermione in a corner away from the boys. Harry performed a charm to get all his things nicely packed into his trunk, and he cleaned Hedwig's cage quickly. The bird chirped happily at him.

They each grabbed their things and got up slowly, Hermione getting rid of the extra beds. Harry looked around the room, his expression unreadable.

This was it. This was the last time he would ever be standing within this bedroom. He smiled happily, because, after all those years of hating the Dursleys and hating where he lived, he was finally free. No longer could he be bound to the miserable depths of this house and this neighborhood. For a second, Harry felt sad. Not because he was leaving this place, no, but because it was sort of the end of an era.

The spell around this house couldn't protect him anymore, and it opened up a whole new slew of feelings. Hogwarts wouldn't protect him anymore, and neither would Dumbledore. His parents were gone, his Godfather was gone, and his mentor was gone. Harry was completely and totally dependent on himself. In this world, it was up to him to save himself, it was up to him to save the wizarding world, and it was up to him to keep the memory of Dumbledore prideful. Harry was finally truly a man.

Although it felt terrifying, at the same time, Harry couldn't help but feel happy. Because it still felt pretty damn good.

---

Hermione, Ron, and Harry dragged their trunks down the stairs, their spirits light, but their trunks not so much. As they stepped off of the stairs, Harry stopped in his tracks, looking back behind him at the tiny cupboard below the stairs.

"Give me a second," he said to Ron and Hermione, who both nodded. He dropped his trunk and turned to the tiny bit of space he had once called home.

He walked to the cupboard, a sad expression on his face. _It's just not right_, he couldn't help but think. It was unfair that while everyone else was playing on their brooms outside, and eating good meals with their parents before curling up in their warm beds, Harry was sitting in a small cupboard, listening to his fat cousin thunder up and down the stairs, and killing spiders so that he didn't accidentally swallow them while he slept.

Harry slowly pulled open the cupboard door, then stuck his head inside. The cupboard looked the same, maybe a little dustier then it used to be. He looked down at the tiny mattress he used to have to curl up on every night. Harry stared around, a little depressed. This room was all he had of his childhood before Hogwarts. Harry pushed away the thought of what would have happened had Hogwarts never reached out towards him. He tried not to imagine himself, the same age, miserable and still sleeping on a too-small bed in a too-small space.

As he pulled his head out of the cupboard, he looked over at his friends, smiling at him. Without them, Hogwarts would have been just as miserable as this tiny cupboard. What they say is true... it really is the people that make the place. Even if he had never gone to Hogwarts, had he met Ron and Hermione, that cupboard would have been just as wonderful to him.

Well, maybe not _that_ wonderful...

"Come on, guys," Harry said, glancing once more at his old bedroom. "It's time to say goodbye."

They found all three Dursley's sitting in the kitchen, eating an early breakfast and watching the television that was about a centimeter away from their faces. They all looked up at Harry, and he could tell by their expressions that they hadn't forgotten what day it was. Uncle Vernon opened his mouth to speak, but Harry beat him to it.

"We're leaving right now," he said quickly. "No need to worry." Then he gave them a fake smile, and added, his voice dripping with sarcasm, "Thanks for all your hospitality."

"Now listen here boy--" Uncle Vernon began, his face glowing ever so purple, but he stopped the instant he saw Harry whip out his wand.

"You can't use that," Dudley said with a harsh laugh, which stopped the second Harry's wand was pointed at his face.

"I'm allowed to do magic outside of school now, I'm of age," he growled. "Besides, there's not even a school to go to now," he turned back to Vernon. "What was it you were about to say?"

Uncle Vernon kept his mouth closed, his eyes wide. Aunt Petunia, on the other hand, wasn't exactly ready for goodbyes.

"What do you mean, there's no school?" she asked, genuinely confused.

Harry shook his head and walked out of the kitchen. "It's not important," he said as he pulled open the front door. He ushered Ron and Hermione out of the door before him, then turned back. "Have a nice life," he called, before slamming the door to Number 4 closed for the very last time.

---

Ottery St. Catchpole, just like the rest of London, found itself in the middle of a cold front. The inhabitants hid indoors, heaters on, even though it was the middle of summer. The only place people seemed to be active in was a part of town that no Muggle had ever dared to enter. A place known as "The Burrow."

Ginny Weasley stood before her home, goosebumps running up and down her bare arms. She was wearing a gold silk gown that was blowing in the wind, along with her silky red curtain of hair. Although she wished the windblown affect would make her look sexy and stunning, her hair kept going into her mouth and her dress was dangerously close to being ripped off from such a strong current. Plus, the wind made it even colder, so her legs were shaking almost out of control, but she refused to go inside.

On the one hand, she would be warm inside, but then she would have to deal with Phlegm's constant nagging and demands, and no one wanted to be around that bride as she panicked. Also, Ginny was still waiting. Waiting for something she had been anticipating since the funeral.

For today was the day of her eldest brother's wedding, the first of the Weasley children to get married. Although Ginny was excited for Bill, other things outshone the wedding, at least in her eyes.

She was waiting outside in the cold because today, her best friend, her brother, and the man she was damn near in love with were all returning home.

She continued to stand, waiting for what she knew would come soon, those pops that would announce their arrival. Although most people tried to avoid being outside alone these days, for fear of being harmed, Ginny knew she was safe. Charms surrounded her home, insuring their safety. It took a lot to break those wards.

As Ginny waited, she could hear people rushing about within the house, hurrying to finish last minute preparations. Ginny knew she should be helping, her mother would be angry later, but she just couldn't concentrate on wedding tasks. Her mind was elsewhere, she had already smashed three plates and seven tea cups.

Suddenly, three pops rang out through the quiet village. Ginny jumped, even though she had been expecting that noise. She felt as though her stomach had risen to her throat, and her heart was beating so fast she feared it would soon beat it's way right out of her chest. Despite the cold, her palms were sweating profusely. She hadn't remembered being this nervous about seeing Harry since she was eleven years old!

She looked up to see Ron, Hermione, and Harry walking towards her. Even though it had only been a month since they had left Hogwarts, Ginny could see the difference. Ron and Harry looked stronger, less gangly, something that only added to Ginny's attraction towards Harry. Hermione looked more mature, as though she had truly become a woman. All three, however, had dark circles beneath their eyes.

Phlegm had insisted her guests wore Muggle clothes, as she called them 'more glamorous', so Ron and Harry both were wearing black tuxedos and bow ties. It was clear how uncomfortable they both felt.

Hermione, on the other hand, looked as though she had never felt more confident. And for good reason! Her normally bushy hair had been charmed straight, and two front pieces were pulled into tiny, intricate braids on the crown of her head, as the rest hung loose. She had donned makeup for the occasion, a rarity for Hermione. Her dress was strapless and floor length, a light pink.

"Wow," Ginny said as they approached, staring at Hermione. "Just... wow."

Hermione beamed, looking down at her strappy heels in embarrassment.

"And Ron... you look..." she paused, and he smiled in anticipation. "A tiny bit awkward." His face fell, so she quickly added, "But so very handsome!" She then slowly turned towards Harry.

"You look gorgeous," Harry said to Ginny before she could say anything. His eyes were wide, and he smiled at her. "More so than usual, anyhow."

Ginny laughed. "You think Phlegm would let me stand near her 'fabulous' alter looking anything but gorgeous?"

They all laughed, Hermione and Ron a bit too hard, as though they were relieved that there were no awkward feelings between Harry and Ginny.

"Come on, we better get inside before we freeze," Ron said, leading the way into the Burrow.

They walked into the kitchen to find sheer chaos. Fleur was sitting in a corner, having her hair done by Gabrielle, her baby sister, but apparently Gabrielle wasn't up to par, for Fleur was screaming at her as tears poured down the young girl's beautiful face. Mrs. Weasley was busy cooking up a storm, trays of this and that overflowing the table. People were randomly running into the kitchen to grab something and then running out.

The second the four walked into the kitchen, everything stopped. Mrs. Weasley looked up instantly. Exhaustion was etched onto her face, something that hadn't gone away since Dumbledore's death. The second she saw who it was, though, she broke out into a huge smile.

"Ron!" she screeched, running to hug her son. "And Harry! You look so handsome!" she pulled Harry into a bone crushingly tight hug. She looked over at Hermione after releasing Harry and covered her mouth. "My goodness, Hermione, you're a woman," she said, tears welling up in her eyes. She took a step back to admire them all. "You all look so very grown up."

Ginny laughed quietly, silently thankful that she wasn't part of this little reunion. Just then, she noticed that Gabrielle had stopped crying, although Fleur was still screaming at her. The young girl was staring at Harry, seemingly mesmerized. Ginny felt a hot rage fill her stomach, and, much as she tried to fight it, she couldn't help but feel protective.

Even though they had broken up, there was no denying how she felt. And Gabrielle had definitely grown up. She had turned from the shy young girl who had been afraid to talk to Harry to a young woman, although she was barely even thirteen yet. Ginny nearly peed her pants when she saw the way the girl stared at Harry, as though he was some sort of prize she was close to winning.

Ginny strode purposely towards Harry.

"Let's go for a walk, shall we?" she whispered seductively in his ear, letting her long hair tickle his neck. She sent a death look over her shoulder towards Gabrielle.

"Okay," Harry said, his voice breaking slightly. Ginny grabbed hold of his hand and gently pulled him out the door. Harry seemed severely confused, but Ginny didn't really care. She had gotten him away from that little girl, and that's all that mattered.

They walked in silence through the garden for a bit, taking it all in. Mrs. Weasley really had gone all out. Fairy lights hung from every tree, and white candles sat atop every surface. The tables that had been magicked in were draped with beautiful silk table cloths that sparkled in the candlelight. The sky was still a foggy gray, but with all the silver and candlelight, it seemed almost mysterious, romantic.

"Wow," Harry said, looking around the yard. "Your mum worked hard, didn't she?"

"You should have seen her. Outside all the time, working her arse off. I'm surprised she's been able to stand up, what with her lack of sleep." She nodded towards the white lily bushes that had replaced the old green ones. "Those took her two days to get in the right places!"

They walked to a bench that had been covered in silk pillows. Ginny say down first, patting the seat next to her.

"So I take it you passed your apparation test," she said, pulling a pillow into her lap and hugging it to her chest.

"Yeah, I wasn't going to take it at all, but Ron and Hermione convinced me to." He looked down at his hands, which were resting in his lap, before adding quietly, "They figured I'd need it."

Ginny nodded, hugging the pillow tighter to her. "Are you scared?" she asked, so lightly Harry could barely hear her.

He looked up this time, straight at her. "I was. But when I think of all the stuff that old bastard's put me through, I know I can do it. And, the thing is," he seemed to be staring into her soul with those eyes. "If I have to die trying, that'll be alright with me."

Ginny looked away quickly. She didn't want him to see how moist her eyes were.

"I don't want you to die," she said quietly, showing the emotion she could usually control.

He looked down as well. "I know."

They sat there in silence for a while, before Harry broke it.

"Ginny, about what happened at the funeral--"

Ginny interrupted him. "You don't have to apologize. I understand."

Even as she said it, she knew it was true. She just didn't want it to be true. All she really wanted was for Harry to take her into his arms and tell her he loved her, she was all he really wanted in life. Screw Voldemort, screw being the chosen one! They'd run off together, and the rest of the world could fend for itself.

As much as she enjoyed these selfish thoughts, she knew that if he did say that to her, she'd deny him. Because she just wasn't as selfish as she wished she could be. She also knew that try as they might to run, it would all eventually catch up with them. That's karma for you.

She could see Harry looking at her out of the corner of her eye, but she didn't look up.

"You know I didn't want to do it," he said quietly. "I just don't want to see you hurt."

"I don't see why you don't believe I can defend myself," Ginny said, still looking away from him.

"Ginny, don't be like this," Harry whined, trying to get her to look at him.

She snapped her head up. "Don't be like what?"

"Like that! Defensive, acting like I'm the one at fault," he said, but the second the words left his mouth, he knew he'd made a mistake.

"You are the one at fault!" she said, laughing at his ridiculous statement. "You broke up with me because you think I'm just a little girl, just Ron's little sister, and that I can't protect myself!" Her voice was loud, and she knew that people inside could probably hear, but she didn't care.

"You know I think of you as more than Ron's little sister," Harry said quietly, looking straight at her, but she looked away. "And I know you can defend yourself, I saw you in the Ministry."

She shook her head. "Then what is it, Harry? Why are you so afraid to let me in?"

"What if he hurts you?" Harry said loudly, making her jump. "What if he hurts you just to hurt me, and I have to spend the rest of my life without you, the rest of my life with this horrible knowledge that you'd still be here if I hadn't been so selfish!"

"Selfish?" Ginny said loudly, standing up. "That's ridiculous! Letting yourself love isn't selfish, you prat. What is selfish is not letting someone else love you simply because you're scared, and you don't want to feel guilty."

He looked away from her, off towards the edge of the yard. "Ginny, I just can't risk it. I can't risk losing you."

"Well that's too bad, Harry," Ginny said, looking at him pityingly. "Because by doing this, you already have lost me."

With that, she turned and walked into the Burrow with dignity and her head held high, but inside, she was slowly dying. Harry stared miserably at her retreating back, thinking a million things up to call after her, but he just didn't have the courage. Voldemort, he could take on. Ginny, she was a whole other story.

_**A/N:** I don't know if I'm going to keep posting on this site. I don't know if I'm going to keep writing. Not just this story. Anything. I don't know if I can handle it. I'm weak like that.  
_

_Anyway, reviews would be nice. Criticism would be nicer._


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: ** I don't own Harry Potter or Clark Gable (the song, not the man... I guess I don't own the man either). I think you know that by now.

**

Life In Every Word

**

Chapter Three 

_I know you're wise beyond your years,  
But do you ever get the fear  
That your perfect verse is just a lie  
That you tell yourself to help you get by_

The instant Ginny walked into the house, there was a pause and then everyone went back to doing what they were previously, just a little bit louder this time. As if Ginny didn't know that they had listened to every word.

"How can I help, Mum?" Ginny asked cheerfully, ignoring the glances everyone kept shooting at her.

"Chop those," her mother ordered, moving aside to let Ginny stand by her. She looked relieved to have help, but Ginny saw the concern in her eyes as she looked at her daughter. "You look lovely, Ginny."

Ginny attempted a smile, knowing very well it didn't look very real. But frankly, she just didn't give a damn.

Ginny spent the next few hours slicing and dicing pears, peaches, lemons, peppers, apples, and a strange fruit that Ginny was slightly afraid of. Harry ambled in a little bit after she did, and she knew by the sudden silence that he was getting the same reaction she had. She kept her head down and stared at the vegetables, not even noticing what she was doing. Her mind was, yet again, elsewhere.

"Ah, 'Arry!" She heard the Gabrielle coo the second he got into the house. "'You must come 'elp me put up decorations. Ees just too 'igh for my little 'ands!"

Ginny heard Harry mumble an excuse as he walked into the living room, and she couldn't help but sneak a peak back at the crestfallen young girl. Gabrielle looked astonished to be turned down. She looked over towards Ginny, and Ginny quickly swung her head back the other way.

"Gin, you're going to cut yourself!" Mrs. Weasley screamed, and Ginny quickly pulled up the knife, which had been dangerously close to her little finger.

"Sorry," Ginny mumbled, returning to her duty. After another hour of her labor, she heard Fleur call from behind.

"Ginny! What are you doing?" she sounded angry. "Making food in zat boot-iful dress? I zink not!"

Ginny dropped the knife quickly, startled. She quickly regained her composure. "I'll just go get refreshed," she muttered, happy to leave the kitchen.

As far as Ginny was concerned, the sooner this wedding was over, the better. She was already sick of having her whole family home, she couldn't wait until it was just her and her parent's again, so she could finally have some peace and quiet. She couldn't believe that just that morning she had actually been looking forward to this! As Ginny powdered her nose angrily, she heard someone approach from behind.

"Hey Ginny," Hermione said, moving in to stand next to the younger girl. "What's wrong?"

Ginny looked over at Hermione, looking so happy in her beautiful dress, and she just couldn't bring herself to tell her all about her problems. Hermione had been doing so much lately, she deserved a night of relaxation. Ginny's woes could wait.

"Oh, nothing, just a little anxious about the wedding," Ginny said, with a false smile. Hermione didn't look like she was buying it, so Ginny decided to change the subject.

"Hermione, I have a question," she said slowly.

"Go ahead," Hermione said with an inviting smile.

"Do you think..." Ginny cut herself off, not sure how to world the question. "Do you think he'll... he'll die?"

Hermione's smile slid off her face, replaced with a look that she had obviously been wearing a lot lately, a look of worry, fear, and exhaustion. Ginny was sure she was reflecting a similar face right back.

"I honestly don't know," Hermione said with a sad sigh. "He could, he could easily. Voldemort has way more practice under his belt, Harry's never killed anyone in his life. He just doesn't have that kind of hate in him, that kind of sheer anger. He can't separate his emotions the way Voldemort can, and that might get him hurt."

Ginny's lip began to quiver, and she looked down at her lap. Hermione wasn't finished, however.

"The thing is, Ginny... Harry's beaten him so many times. If Voldemort could kill him, he would have already been able to. Plus, Harry truly is his match, because as much hate and evil Voldemort has in his body, Harry's got twice as much love and goodness."

Ginny looked back up, a smile on her previously crestfallen face.

"Although Harry may not have the skill to fight Voldemort, he's got the heart," she smiled and added, "And the way he doesn't separate his emotions... that might just win it for him in the end."

"Time to go!" Fred called from behind them, all dressed up in his finest Muggle clothes, which just so happened to include a bright purple bow tie.

Ginny and Hermione got up slowly, and began walking towards the fireplace, their minds exploding with thoughts. Just as they were getting up to the fireplace, however, Ginny's pulled Hermione aside. She gave her friend a huge hug, smiling widely.

"I've missed you," she said into Hermione's hair, and Hermione smiled back.

"You don't know how exhausting it is to spend all your time with boys," she said with a laugh. They let go of each other and stepped up to the fireplace.

"So we're allowed to get into an ashy fireplace, but we can't cut vegetables?" Ginny muttered to her friend, who laughed.

"At least this way we can't chop our fingers off! You know how horrible that dress would look with a bit of red mixed in?" Hermione said with a giggle.

Ginny playfully hit her as they clambered into the smoky pit.

---

Ginny walked down the aisle slowly, walking the way she had been forced to practice for nearly an hour the day before. Her shoes were uncomfortably tight and her dress was too thin in this freezing church. Although she was shivering and her foot was bleeding, she did feel beautiful. Every eye was on her as she drifted down the aisle, the music playing lightly. Of course, the second Gabrielle stepped out from behind the big church doors, all the eyes shifted to her. All the eyes but two, of course.

Ginny was fully aware of Harry's eyes on her the entire time she had been walking down the aisle, much as she tried to ignore it. As she drew closer to the alter, though, she finally succumbed. She looked to her right at the first pew, where Harry was sitting next to her parents, Fred, George, Ron, and Hermione. Their eyes locked for a split second, nearly freezing Ginny mid step. She looked away quickly, but she couldn't deny the pounding of her heart.

She slid up the alter to stand next to Charlie, and as she passed Bill, she noticed how very happy he was. Happy to be in love, happy to be alive. A surge of jealousy passed through her body. All she wished was that she'd find love like that eventually, that someday she'd be so happy she could just burst.

However, she knew that it took a lot for Bill to get to this place in his life. Just look at the way his face had become a mask of his old one, the way his smile seemed odd and awkward on his strange features. The scars covering his face showed the scars of his past, and the scars of his future. The scars of the world's future.

Just then, it clicked for Ginny. She'd been selfish, more than ever imaginable. The way she felt as though her life had been ruined by Harry leaving, by Harry breaking up with her, but look at what could come from him not doing that. Everyone in this room, all the people she cared about most in the world, could all be gone in an instant. She was being stupid, arguing with him for doing this. She decided now that if he felt he could go and fight and be with her, he could tell her, but if he knew that to go and fight, he had to break up with her, she would respect that. Maybe she wouldn't agree with it, but she'd respect it. Because she did, in all, respect Harry.

Ginny was jerked out of her thoughts by Gabrielle. The young girl moved to stand next to Ginny, and while doing so, she stepped, rather roughly, onto Ginny's foot. Ginny gasped out loud in pain, as Gabrielle covered her mouth in fake shock.

"I'm soo sorry!" she whispered quietly. Then she swiveled her heel before moving her foot.

Ginny had tears welling up in her eyes from the searing pain, and she wanted nothing more than to reach over and throttle the little brat. Instead, she turned towards the church doors and waited for Fleur to float through.

The doors slowly swung open and Fleur stepped out on the arm of a devilishly handsome man, who Ginny assumed was her father. A halo of light came from the open doors, surrounding the two in a sort of spotlight. Not that Fleur needed one. Every eye was on her.

She wore a strapless white gown with a long silk train. Tiny sequined flowers covered the bodice of her dress beautifully, and she seemed to be floating on air. Her hair was pulled into a simple yet delicate twist, and a shimmering veil topped it, hanging down to her lower back.

Ginny, despite her feelings towards Fleur, began to truly tear up, and this time not only because Gabrielle had been wearing stilettos. She glanced at Bill and saw his eyes were watering as he took Fleur's hand from her dad. She also saw that both her own parents were crying, her mum a little bit more... dramatically so.

As the ceremony continued, more people began to cry, some hysterically, such as Mrs. Weasley, and others calmly, like Ginny. By the end, there wasn't a dry eye in the place. Ginny even swore she saw George wipe a tear.

"I now pronounce you," the priest said, "Man and wife." The room was filled with cheers as Bill and Fleur leaned in for a kiss. Ginny saw Bill mouth 'I love you' to Fleur, and when Fleur mouthed it back, the tears in Ginny's eyes toppled over the rims.

She walked back down the aisle slowly, pondering if she'd ever find love like this. As though he had been reading her thoughts, Harry suddenly appeared at her side. Her knight in shining armor as a child was now looking at her shyly, and she felt as though the rolls had been switched.

"What do you want, Harry?" she said exasperatedly. She was tired of fighting.

"I don't really know," he said quietly. "I just don't want us to be like this, I don't want us to be angry at each other."

"I'm not angry," Ginny said too quickly. She took a breath and continued. "I really do understand, Harry. You have to do this, and I want you to do whatever you think will help."

Harry nodded. "Gin, if I didn't have to go do this, I wouldn't have broken up with you. It's just... I'm scared."

"I understand," she said, reaching out and grabbing his hand. "I honestly do. When you get back, we can be together."

Harry nodded again, looking away. "What if I don't come back?" he said quietly.

"Well you have to!" Ginny said with a laugh, but he wasn't smiling back. She looked at him more seriously and continued. "Harry, I have pined after you since I was ten. I planned our wedding before I'd even met you. I never really believed, though, that you would return my feelings. But then, this past year, everything changed..." She looked down and he squeezed her hand gently. "I barely got a month with you, Harry."

He reached over and pulled her into a hug, as people gently nudged by them in the aisle.

"It's not fair," Ginny said quietly, holding him tightly.

"Nothing in my life has ever really been fair, Ginny," he said quietly. "But being with you was the closest I've ever gotten to feeling human, you know? It was the closest I've ever gotten to being a real person, to living the life I always wished I could live." He gently began to play with her hair and she nuzzled her head into his shoulder. "I don't want to leave you here, but I know it'll be so much harder if I leave you here without us being broken up."

"But why?" she asked quietly, not pleading with him, simply curious.

"Because I'm afraid that if I don't come back, you'll feel like you can't move on. And Ginny, all I want is for you to be happy," he pulled back and looked at her.

"I don't think I'll ever be able to move on."

He grabbed her hand and they began to walk towards the floo line. "You have to," he said. "The worst thing I can imagine is you being alone."

She nodded, looking away from him. Then she turned back, and she said, a bit roughly, "Harry, why do you always have to be so damn noble?"

He smiled sadly at her, but she still wouldn't look at him. "Why do you always have to fight it?" he asked gently, but she wasn't playing anymore.

"Malfoy and Snape know," she said quietly.

"What?"

"They know about us. They're going to tell him, and then he'll know."

Harry nodded. "But if they find out we're broken up, they'll think you didn't really mean anything to me." He looked over at her, but she was looking anywhere but at him. "They'd be wrong, though. You mean the world to me."

"Stop," she said sharply. "Just stop. Don't tell me how much I mean to you or how much you care about me. It just makes it all so much harder."

"Sorry," he said quietly, looking down. She looked over at him this time.

"Harry, I'm always going to love you, no matter what happens." She threw a handful of powder onto the fire. "If you realize you can love me and still fight, I'll be waiting. But if you don't think you'll ever be ready to love me one hundred percent, let me know. Because after nearly seven years, I think it's high time I move on."

And with that, she disappeared into the green flames.

---

The reception was in full swing by eleven o'clock that night. Ginny had been having fun, dancing wildly with her oldest friends and her beloved family, but her heart wasn't all the way in it. She couldn't stop thinking about Harry, about how miserable he looked. She knew she had hurt him, but she also knew that he deserved it. The way she had felt these last few weeks was all his fault, and he needed to feel even half as depressed as she did.

Ginny moved into the food line as her stomach began to growl. As she was waiting, a loud crack of thunder sounded. She looked at the sky, worried that it would begin to rain. A little bit of rain was all it would talk to send both her mother and Fleur over the edge.

Sure enough, by the time Ginny had finished her meal, a drop of rain splattered onto her head. Following that first drop came a sudden downpour. The guests screamed, the women covering their heads and the men wrapping up in their coats. They all ran inside quickly, hurrying to escape the approaching storm.

Ginny quickly joined her mother in picking up chairs and tables, trying to save what they could. Her hair was matted to her head and her mascara was surely running, but she didn't care. Her mum had worked far too hard on this wedding to have it destroyed by a little bit of water.

"Ginny, go inside!" Mrs. Weasley yelled at Ginny, but her voice was muffled by the winds that had started up.

"Mum, I'm fine!" Ginny yelled back, her voice equally as quiet. "It's no big deal."

They finally cleared everything, but as they were heading inside, Ginny felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned to see Harry, just as wet as her, his wild hair finally staying down with the water.

"Let's get inside!" Ginny called to him and began to go towards the door. He didn't follow. "We'll be inside in a second," she yelled to her Mum. She looked worried but nodded and closed the door behind her.

"Ginny, I need to talk to you," Harry said nervously.

"Harry, we've talked enough. Can't we just go inside?" She began to shiver and wrapped her arms around her body.

"I want to be alone for once," he said, taking off his coat and handing it to her.

"I'm fine," she declined, pushing it back. "Okay, what is so important that you can't tell me inside?"

"Ginny," he said, but looked down and didn't continue. "Ginny, I'm scared."

She looked at him, surprised. The rain on his cheeks was mixed with tears as he lowered his face into his hands. He looked so vulnerable and innocent, so she reached out to him.

"Harry," she said, pulling him to her. She didn't know the right words to say, so instead she just held him, letting him cry onto her shoulder.

"He's taken everything from me," he began to whisper into her ear. "He took my parents, and then Sirius, and now Dumbledore. He's taken anyone who ever meant anything to me. What if he takes Ron and Hermione? What if he takes your parents?" He sniffed. "Ginny, what if he takes you?"

"Harry, he won't," she said, rubbing the back of his neck lightly. "He won't take us. There is nothing in the world that could keep us from you, Harry."

"You're so amazing," he cried softly. "You're so amazing and I can't have you."

"You'll always have me," Ginny whispered.

"No, I can't," he said, pulling away from her. "I can't have you. You need to hate me, you need to hate me so that it's easier for me to leave."

She shook her head. "Harry, you know I won't ever hate you."

"Why the hell not? I've been horrible to you!" The vulnerable, crying Harry of seconds before was gone, and the comforting, loving Ginny had disappeared along with him.

"Because I love you!" she shouted. "I love you and you know it! And I know this may sound a bit egotistical, but I'm pretty sure you love me, too!"

He backed away from her. "I can't do this," he said, shaking his head. "I can't do this anymore. I don't want to fight."

"THEN LET ME LOVE YOU!" she shouted, her words echoing through the rain. She let out a sob and a silence formed around them, shaking them to the core. Her powerful words had struck him, but he wouldn't let her know that.

Harry simply shook his head, the tears forming again. "I don't deserve you," he said, then turned and walked into the noisy house.

Ginny turned away from the house, tears once again forming in her eyes. She was getting sick of this, this crying over Harry thing. But as the tears began to pour, she realized she couldn't separate them from the rain that was dripping down her cheeks. She looked up towards the rain, catching the raindrops on her eyelashes, and peace washed over her.

It was strange, but whenever Ginny felt sad or angry or depressed, and she couldn't find a bit of happiness in her, she would forget the feeling of being happy. It would just wash right out of her body, and it made her wonder if she was ever truly happy.

Ginny had spent majority of her life lonely. She was always alone, she never really had a best friend. Up until her forth year, she had gone unnoticed by nearly everyone at Hogwarts, known as either a Weasley or that girl Harry Potter once saved. When Michael had asked her out, her life changed dramatically. She showed him her personality, she showed him a part of her she'd never shown anyone before.

With him, she had been happy. With him, she had felt beautiful and smart and funny. With help from him, she realized who she really was. Which was why, after breaking up with Michael, she didn't feel horrible. She knew that it was over long before it really was, but she had held on to him simply because of the way he made her feel. When they had broken up, she realized she could feel that way without him, and that was the day her life truly changed.

The rain washed away Ginny's tears as she continued to look up at the dark sky. Without Harry, she was still her. She was still the same girl as she had always been. But part of her had been changed by Harry. He taught her that she didn't need to settle. The way Harry made her feel, the intense love she had for him, that wasn't going anywhere. She knew that she would never be with anyone who didn't give her that feeling, even if she had to die alone. The thought of being with someone for the rest of her life who didn't make her smile or laugh like that, who didn't make her feel like she was floating on air, that made her want to cry.

She heard the screen door squeak as someone pulled it open. For a fleeting second, her heart jumped, hoping it was the only person she really wanted to see.

Instead, though, she heard her mum's voice.

"Ginny, come inside! You're going to get sick!"

Ginny sighed and walked back inside, back to the party. However, she wasn't in a very festive mood.

**_A/N:_**_ I suppose it's a good time to update. Things have been hectic lately and are going to get even more hectic soon, but I'll try to update once a week until you're caught up to my other site. But for now, you'll just have to be happy with my slow pace. Thank you for the reviews and love, keep it coming._


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: ** Still not mine. The song The Luckiest belongs to Ben Folds, even though I wish I could have it.

** Life In Every Word**

**Chapter Four**

The rain stopped by midnight, and, after a few charms, everyone was back outside and dry. Once again, the party was in full swing, as witches and wizards alike danced their problems away. Ginny had cleaned herself up and was warm again, but she still felt cold inside. Her heart had been broken so many times that day, and she wished more than anything she could just curl up into a warm ball in her bed. Keeping up appearances was proving to be pretty dificult, but she had to pull it off. Today wasn't about her.

_ I don't get many things right the first time._

_In fact, I am told that a lot. _

The band began to play a slow song that Ginny had never heard before. A beautiful baritone voice played around the tables and surrounded her. The song had a distinct romantic feel, and Ginny sighed with frustration. Couples began to fill the dance floor. She stayed at a table with Hermione, watching the happy people enjoy themselves. She couldn't help but feel spiteful towards the dancers, and she found herself imagining each person that whirled by her tripping and falling flat on their faces.

She didn't know where Harry was, and she tried hard not to care. Hermione sat next to her, muttering under her breath and spinning the contents of her glass around sloppily. She had switched from Butterbeer to Firewhiskey quite some time ago, and now turned to Ginny and slurred, "Men suck."

From what Ginny had discovered from Hermione's drunken rambles, it seemed that she was angry at Ron. She had walked over by him and overheard him flirting with some cousin of Fleur's. When Hermione caught them at it, Ron had decided it would be a good time to make a joke. Obviously Hermione didn't agree.

The two had been walking on egg shells around each other ever since Dumbledore's funeral. Ron had comforted Hermione afterwards, and they had ended up snogging a little bit, but afterwards they were both too nervous to bring it up again. They had then spent all their time at the Dursley's and with Harry in Godric's Hollow, so they never had a chance to really be alone and talk about things. They had just been super polite to each other.

When Ron had been trying to worm his way out of the cousin situation, he had claimed that it didn't matter anyway, because they weren't really a couple. Hermione had burst into tears and run away, only to find herself more miserable alone. So she sought Ginny out, forcing the other girl to sit by as her friend drank her problems into oblivion.

The spiteful words had just left Hermione's mouth when Ron appeared, a rose in his hand.

"A rose for a rose," he tried lamely, making Hermione snort with drunken laughter. He blushed a deep crimson, then tried again. "Hermione, you know that you're the only one I love. That other girl, she was nothing. I'm an idiot, and for once and for all, let's just make this official."

Hermione simply stared at him, a bit bleary eyed, so he added, "Hermione, please, be my girlfriend. It's about time."

She gasped and stood up, stumbling a bit. "Oh Won-Won!"

She fell into a drunken fit of laughter again, and Ron just stared at her until she had composed herself. "Of course, you dolt!" she managed to spill out.

Ron beamed. "Dance with me, beautiful."

Together, the two walked onto the dance floor with all the others, Hermione slightly stumbling and Ron holding her up.

Ginny looked around to make sure no one was watching, then tipped the contents of Hermione's glass into her own.

"Perfect," she muttered sarcastically as the alcohol burned its way down her throat.

_Now I know all the wrong turns, _

_Stumbles, and falls brought me here. _

Ginny hated this song. It was so happy and lovey dovey, just like all those stupid couples. Why couldn't Ginny find anyone? Why did she always feel so alone, even if she was surrounded by people? She knew now that everything was going to be different. She wasn't going to be able to date random guys anymore, not after everything that had happened with Harry. She didn't need pointless dating, she couldn't settle. If she couldn't have Harry, she'd have to find someone else who matched up, or at least came close.

Ginny took a swig of the last of the firewhiskey and looked back at the couples. All year, she had pretended she was so strong and independent, pretended she could take on the world. Sure, it was easy to pretend to be strong in the little cocoon Hogwarts made for her, but now that Hogwarts was probably finished with, she knew she couldn't hide out. She couldn't just pretend anymore. She had to be that strong girl everyone expected her to be.

Every guy she had dated was just a cover for her. She had taken Hermione's advice and acted like herself around Harry, but was it really herself? She didn't even know who she was anymore. She had become so consumed in everyone else's opinions of her, she had gotten so used to being what everyone expected her to be. She tried to be funny, like Fred and George, and brave, the way Ron was when he fought alongside Harry. She tried to be a good Quidditch player like Charlie, she tried to be smart like Bill and Percy. She tried to take care of people the way her mother did and she took an interest in Muggle things to bond with her father. Everything she did was for someone else, she was always trying to live up to those before her.

It was time she started living for herself.

"Ginny," a voice said from behind her. She turned to see Harry standing there, his hand held out towards her. "Can't we just, for tonight, be like them?" he nodded at Ron and Hermione, who were leaning against each other on the dance floor. "Just dance with me."

"We both know that's not a good idea," Ginny said, pouring the last of the champagne from the bottle into her glass. Ron wispered something into Hermione's ear and she laughed, then nuzzled herself against him. Both of their faces were serious now.

"But why not?" he asked like a little kid denied a pony ride, sitting down next to her. Hermione said something quietly, with a small smile on her face. Ron looked surprised at first, looking down at her with a mix of love, adoration, and amusement on his face.

"Because when I'm with you, I tend to lose control." She downed the champagne. Next to her was a full glass, so she poured the liquid into her own glass. Ron gently kissed the top of Hermione's head, and her smile grew.

"I can see how much you like being in control," he nodded to the glass at her lips.

She glared at him. "It's a special occasion. I'm allowed to get smashed."

"So get smashed with me," he whined. Her brother and Hermione had spun off into the crowd, and now she had no choice but to focus on Harry.

"Are you ready to love me?" She asked him seriously, knowing he wouldn't be ready. As much as she wished she could just pretend he was in love with her, she knew pretending didn't get her anywhere these days.

He looked down. "I don't know."

"Then I can't _just_ dance with you. It'll be too hard."

He looked up at her. "Gin, I'm leaving tomorrow, and I may never be coming back. You know that, and I know that, so for God's sake, just give me one effing dance."

He pulled her up off her feet and she set her glass on the table. She was just so damn tired of fighting him. Maybe he'd get what he wanted and then let her move on with her life. Swaying a bit as she stood, he wrapped his hands around her waist, steadying her. He led her to the dance floor, and she laid her head onto his shoulder in an old position they easily reformed to. She had thought that such a position had been forgotten. They gently swayed to the music. Ginny could hear his heartbeat in her ear, and she silently cursed herself for having given in so easily. She was never going to be over him at this rate.

_And where was I before the day_

_That I first saw your lovely face_

_Now I see it everyday _

Harry leaned in towards Ginny's ear. She could feel his warm breath on the back of her neck, and it sent shivers down her spine. Shivers of both elation and fear. She tried to ignore them, but it was hard. It was hard to ignore something so close to her, something she wanted so badly. He whispered to her softly.

"Did you mean what you said before? That you'll always love me?"

Ginny sighed, the magic she had felt at first seeming to have disolved a bit. She lifted her head off his shoulder. "Oh, I don't know," she muttered. "Probably..."

"But why?" He asked, staring into her eyes again, and that familiar feeling came back in her stomach, that feeling of butterflies. Those damn butterflies.

"Isn't it obvious?" Ginny asked with a mischievous smile.

"What? Just that I'm the 'Chosen One'?" He asked, a bit sadly.

She quietly chuckled. "Harry, if you really think that's why, you're even dafter than I thought!" he looked crestfallen. "Everyone can see how great you are, Harry. Everyone but you, apparently."

She laid her head back onto her shoulder again, and closed her eyes. As she did so, she faintly heard him whisper, "I can see how great you are."

She smiled but didn't say anything, and for a bit longer, they just swayed to the music.

_ And I know that I am,_

_I am, I am the Luckiest _

"I like this song," Ginny whispered, prior to her last devilish thoughts. Right now, she felt happy, even if he was confusing her more. She meant every word she said. As much as she tried to be angry with him, she couldn't do it. Fighting her heart was more exhausting than fighting Voldemort.

Harry looked down at the top of Ginny's head, a small smile on his face. "Me too."

He gently kissed her forehead, and she looked up at him. _Fighting be damned,_ she thought to herself. She was going to have a good time tonight, even if it was the last time she'd be with Harry. It was time to allow herself to be happy, time to allow herself to flirt a little for once. Like the old days.

"I like a lot of things..." she said in her sexiest voice.

"Oh really?" he asked with a grin. "Like what?"

"Well," she began with a dramatic sigh, "I like rainy days and big umbrellas, I like Quidditch games and drunken Hermiones... I like slow dances and champagne. I like Charms class and Chocolate Frogs." She looked up at him. "I like lightning bolt scars and emerald green eyes." She leaned in towards his lips as she whispered. "And I definitely like boys named Harry."

Harry smiled and kissed her nose. She tilted her head back so that their lips were even.

_What If I'd been born 50 years before you_

_In a house on a street where you lived _

"Ginny, I--" Harry whispered so quietly that she couldn't hear him.

"What?" she said softly, her eyes still on his lips.

_Maybe I'd be outside as you passed on your bike_

_Would I know _

"I--" he began again, but stopped.

"You what, Harry?" she asked again, softer, finding his eyes with hers.

"I think..." He cut himself off and looked away from her.

_Then in a wide sea of eyes_

_I'd see one pair that I recognized  
_

"I think..." he paused, looking back at her.

"You think what?"

His eyes bore into her soul again, sending sparks from her toes to the top of her head. But instead of saying what she hoped he'd say, he just shook his head.

_And I'd know that I am_

_I am, I am the Luckiest _

"Why are you so afraid, Harry?" she asked tenderly, still staring into his eyes.

"I'm not afraid," he said, but they both knew it was a lie.

"Harry, you won't love me because you think I'll be hurt if you open your heart. But the only way you could hurt me is if you don't give me a chance!" She said, then looked down. A stop on the floor beneath them was all she could stare at, but it began to spin away as her eyes got misty."I'm sick of trying, Harry. I really am. I'm the girl, and dammit, in those Muggle movies, the girl always gets chased. So stop making me chase you Harry. Just let me love you, and love me back the way I know you can."

Harry lifted her chin so that she had to look back up at him.

"I'm scared to love you because I'm leaving so soon. I can't bare to leave you here the day after we declare our love, and I'm scared that if I don't come back, it will hurt you more. I'm scared because I know that if he does kill me, he'll come after everyone I love first. And I'm scared because the person I love most is you, and that means you'll be the first he goes after." He stared at her long and hard, then added, "I'm scared that you won't move on if I don't come back, and you continue to love the memory of me. But what I'm scared of most is that you will move on, and I'll just be a man you once loved."

Ginny couldn't help it, she laughed. He looked shocked.

"Harry, you fool. Even if I do move on, I will always love you. I could be a crazy old woman surrounded by cats, and I won't stop thinking about you. But just because I may still love you doesn't mean I can't love anyone else. I don't want to think about that, though, Harry, because I believe, more than anything, you will come back. You'll come back for me because you've always been my hero, and I trust you to save the day."

He smiled at her and whispered, "I do have a saving people thing..."

"Stop being afraid, Harry," she smiled up at him. "The only thing you should be afraid of is that if you don't give this a chance, you might miss out on something really great. What if we _are_ soul mates, Harry? What if you _are_ 'the one'? I don't want to miss that because of fear. That's just what Voldemort wants, and if you give up on love, you give up on life! Harry, this year is going to be so hard, but we can help each other get through it! Don't leave it like this, Harry. Don't be afraid anymore."

Harry didn't say anything more, just leaned in, this time touching her lips with his. They gently embraced, and it felt right. Even though it had only been a bit of time they were apart, it felt as though an eternity since they had last touched like this. Ginny moved in closer to him, feeling as though she wanted to be part of him, and him a part of her. She wasn't sure anymore where she stopped and where he began, and she was enjoying that feeling. She wanted them to be together forever, and no way would she let anything get between them again.

He stopped kissing her and looked down at her, before whispering into her lips. "I think I'm ready to love you."

She gently moved her head back and whispered, never moving her eyes from his, "I know I'm ready to love you."

_I love you more than I have_

_Ever found the way to say to you  
_

She leaned in to kiss him again, but this time he pulled back.

"Ginny, nothing's changed," he said sadly. "I'm still leaving tomorrow, we have no time together.

"No," she said, pulling him back to her. "We have tonight."

She laid her head back onto his shoulder, and a tear rolled down her cheek and onto his suit jacket.

"I'm going to miss you,"he said, kissing the top of her head. "More than you know possible."

_Next door there's an old man who lived to his 90s_

_Then one day, passed away in his sleep _

"I'm going to miss you too," she said as tears flowed down her lovely face. She looked back up at him. He wiped her tears away with his thumb, then kissed her salty lips.

"Let's not think about that tonight," he said, taking off his jacket and wrapping her in it.

"Tonight," she said, pulling him back to her. "Let's just be in love."

_And his wife, she stayed for a couple of days_

_And passed away  
_

Ginny took Harry's head and led him off the dance floor. They floated between all the other couples, who were absorbed in themselves. They walked by the tables and chairs, and into the dark and empty house. No one noticed their departure.

"Where are we going?" whispered Harry, but she simply put a finger to his lips.

They walked through the house and to the stairs. Silently and slowly, they began their ascent.

_I'm sorry I know that's a_

_Strange way to tell you _

_That I know we belong together _

Ginny stopped after the second flight of stairs and pulled open a wooden door. She stepped inside backwards, pulling Harry in after her. He looked around, not all too surprised to find himself in her room. The walls were green, and covered in posters of Quidditch teams and pictures of her friends from Hogwarts. He noticed a picture of the two of them sitting in the library, eating chocolate eggs, and he walked towards it.

"I remember that! We got kicked out!" he said with a smile. Ginny smiled as well as she came up from behind him and wrapped her arms around him, leaning her cheek against the back of his shirt. She almost wanted to bury herself in him forever.

"Colin gave me it," she said without moving her face. "I didn't even know he was there."

"Me neither..." he said, turning around in her arms so that he was facing her. "I was distracted by my company."

Ginny absentmindedly lifted her hand to his cheek, feeling the slight stubble against her hand. She gently pulled off his glasses and set them on the desk next to her. Her hand glided across his cheek and towards his eyes, gently tracing the outline. It seemed as though she was trying to take in his face, trying to burn the feel into her memory. She moved her finger from his eyes to his lips, gently tracing them. Harry ran his fingers through her smooth hair, and for what felt like an eternity, they simply took in the feel of the other's body heat against them.

A cold breeze flew in the open window, tugging them both back into reality. Ginny moved away from Harry and sat on the edge of her bed, then pulled him down next to her. Her bed was covered in a soft white quilt, silky against their skin. She gently eased herself into a horizontal position, and Harry followed suit. He pulled her so that she was leaning against him, their faces even on her pillow.

Ginny shivered suddenly, filled with emotion for what she knew would come. He lifted his hand to her face and traced a line down the side, gently taking in her beauty. His hand softly nudged her face towards him, and then their lips were touching. They kissed slowly and gently, exploring each other with their tongues.

Ginny gently untied Harry's tie and pulled it over his head while he gently kissed her neck. She moved her head so that his lips were on hers again, and their kissing became rougher, untamed. She rolled over so that she was on top of him as he began to unbutton his shirt, gently pushing the buttons aside. Ginny reached for the long zipper going up the side of her dress, but the feel of Harry's hand against hers stopped her.

He looked up into her eyes, removing his lips from her as he said, so quietly she had to strain to hear him, "Are you sure?"

_And I know that I am_

_I am, I am the Luckiest _

Those simple three words terrified Ginny, but at the same time, she knew... this was all she really wanted.

Ginny looked into his eyes as she pulled down the zipper all the way, exposing her pale, smooth skin.

"Harry, you're the only one I'll ever want. I've been waiting for this moment since the day I met you." She kissed him as she gently pulled off his shirt.

"I love you," he whispered.

She kissed him softly, and then, pressing her forehead against him, she whispered, "And I, you."

And then, it was only them. Sure, the world was still spinning, people were still fighting, children were crying, and others were dying, but that didn't matter just then. It was only the two pairs of lips, embracing, letting each other know they weren't alone. They explored each other slowly, enjoying the quiet between them, only broken by small gasps for breath and the sound of their kissing. They knew that this was only one night, that tomorrow Harry would have to leave, but they just didn't care. For this night was to be the greatest night either of them would ever have, a tender moment between two teenage lovers beneath the sheets.

And as Ginny reached for the candle lighting her room, she knew... Voldemort was still out there somewhere, but just then, it was just the two of them, in love in what felt like heaven. And with that, she blew out the dim flame.

_I am, I am, I am_

_The Luckiest_

_** A/N: ** I was feeling really romantic when I wrote this chapter, since I was on a train moving through Verona, home of Romeo and Juliet. I hope you all like it, it was by far the chapter I struggled with most. I apologize if I messed up the song, I did that all from memory. I hope you guys actually read the words to the song, it's my favorite one in the world. I mean, it just melts me. Ben Folds is seriously a genius, and I suggest any of you listen to him. That song, The Luckiest, is from his CD Rockin' the Suburbs.  Buy it. Seriously.  
_

_ Right now, things are really hectic, so it might take time between updates. I apologize. And anyone from my other site who's reading this, I promise that I'll update on there... well, actually, I can't say when I will. Spring Break is coming up and I'll be gone, then I get home and it's hell week with the play, and then I go to New York. I'll try to fit in an update sometime in there, though. Just hold your horses._

_** Please** review.  
_


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: ** Not mine, yo dizzo. Paper Rock Scissors belongs to Jamisonparker. I just like the words.

**

Life In Every Word  
Chapter Five 

**

_And I can't wait to **write you a letter**  
For every day that I can't **bear.**  
You can fill these moments with **words like forever**  
but you **gotta swear**  
Don't forget to** remember me.**_

Harry and Ginny stood in front of the Burrow. The wind was blowing furiously and Ginny was cold, but for the moment, she couldn't feel it. Right then, all she could feel was heart break. They were alone out there, as Ron and Hermione had been inside for a few minutes, saying goodbye.

"I meant every word I said last night," Harry said, pulling Ginny to him.

"So did I," she whispered, as tears ran down her delicate face.

"I don't want to go," he whined, as though he were a small child being forced to leave a friend's house.

"I don't want you to, either," she said, her legs shaking as she hugged him tightly. If he were to move just then, she would have toppled over. It felt so right, the way he had to support her to keep her up. He was more than just her safety net. He was her legs, her arms, her body. He was the keeper of her heart and the only person to ever touch her soul in such a way.

Harry gently stroked her hair, resting his chin on top of her head. "I don't need to go," he whispered. "I could just stay here with you. We can live a normal life, we can get married, we can be happy. That's all we need."

Ginny laughed gently. "As fantastic as that sounds, we both know we couldn't ever be that selfish."

Harry groaned, tracing her back gently with his finger. "Let's be selfish," he muttered, his words disappearing into the wind. The weather seemed to be mourning just as much as they were.

"Last night was perfect," Ginny whispered into his chest. "I want nights like that for the rest of our lives."

"We will," Harry said. "We just have to wait."

Ginny lifted her head up and kissed him lightly on the lips. He kissed her back, harder, and before they knew it, they were kissing each other viciously, holding on to the little bit of life they had left in them.

"You're coming home," Ginny whispered into his lips. "You have to come home."

He nodded. "I will. I promise you, I'll come home." He smiled. "I don't think I've ever had a home to return to."

She looked up at him, her eyes shining with emotion. "You do now. Wherever I am, you'll always have a home."

"I love you," he whispered, causing her to start to cry. He pulled her to him tightly, hugging her with all his strength. "I'm going to come home to you."

Ginny nodded at him, wiping her own tears. "I don't even know where you're going..."

"We're going back to Godric's Hollow," Harry said, looking off towards the village. "There's some stuff I need to finish up there."

Ginny knew not to press. "How long do you think you'll stay there?"

"As long as it takes," he said, then looked back at her. "But the sooner I can get home, the better."

She smiled through her tears at him. "Write me as much as possible," she said, even though she knew he probably wouldn't be able to.

"I'll try my hardest," he said, then lifted her face to his. He kissed her lightly, and she smiled at him. "I love you so much."

"I love you too," she said, trying not to cry anymore. "More than you could ever know."

"Time to go, mate," Ron called as he and Hermione emerged from the house. The Weasley family followed, waiting to say goodbye.

"Promise me you'll return," Ginny cried quietly, not letting go of his hand.

"I'll try, Ginny, I'll try so hard," he said, holding her hand equally as tight. "Wait for me."

"Until the day I die," her lip quivered as he stepped away, saying goodbye to the others.

Then he, Hermione, and Ron walked out of the garden, towards the end of the road. They turned to wave goodbye to everyone, and Harry blew her a kiss.

She blew one back and mouthed "I love you."

He smiled, looked at her longingly, and mouthed, "I love you too."

Then, with a pop, they were gone. Ginny stared at the spot where they had departed from for a long time, crying softly, until her mum wrapped her arms around her and brought her back inside.

Ginny sat at the table as her mum poured her a cup of tea, her mind elsewhere. All remnants of the reception were gone, but Ginny knew she would never be the same.

Charlie stood up after an hour and three cups of tea, kissing his family goodbye.

"Bye Gin," he said softly, kissing the top of her head. She barely noticed he was there. "You've grown up too fast," he said with a small smile, and for a second, she was sure he knew about the night before.

But he just looked at her and said, "It'll get better, Gin. Don't worry."

Then he closed the door behind him and set off the same the others had.

Fred and George stood next. "No big goodbyes from us," George said. "We've got a long day of work ahead of us."

And they left the same way everyone else had. Suddenly, Ginny realized what had just happened. It was as if she'd turned ten years old again. She was an only child, and she was pining after The-Boy-Who-Lived. Except this time, she wasn't a child. And he was pining too.

---

After her brothers had left, Ginny walked up the stairs quietly. She didn't offer any explanation to her mother, but her mum understood. With each step, she felt as though her body was getting heavier, as though she had been filled with lead. After she finally reached her bedroom, she collapsed onto her bed.

She could still smell Harry on the sheets.

Tears began to pour down her face as thoughts began to whir through her head. Did she make a mistake? No, but she loved Harry, it was right. But what if he didn't love her? No, he did, he told her he did! Yeah, but he could have lied. No, Harry wouldn't lie to her, he was always so honest to her. Plus, he's not the kind of guy who would do that just to get some action. But did she really know Harry? What if she only thought she knew him.

Ginny continued to miserably puzzle the night before, until she drifted off into a dreamless, heavy sleep.

---

When Ginny awoke, her room was pitch black. She looked at the clock by her beside table. 1:36 am. Her parents would still be asleep.

She got up and pulled on her fuzzy robe. Even with the robe on, it was cold out, and her skin was covered in goosebumps. Noiselessly, she drifted down the stairs, avoiding the third step down from her floor, the one that creaked. She floated through the kitchen and out the door, into the dark night.

The yard looked different late at night. Everything was dark and scary, it seemed strangely empty. Ginny walked to the bench in the middle of the garden. The very same bench she had sat next to Harry on before the wedding.

The bench was slightly damp from dew, but Ginny didn't care. The cool water actually felt good against her skin. It somehow reminded her that she was still human.

She sat on the bench for a long time, staring up at the starry night sky. Her mind had the urge to ramble again, but she fought it. She couldn't think anymore. Right then, in her peaceful state of mind, she needed to just... be.

It began to rain slightly an hour after she had first sat down, jerking her out of her relaxed trance. She looked around. In the rain, everything looked a lot less mysterious. There was the wet patch of grass they used as a makeshift Quidditch field, there was the garden they had de-gnomed once a week during the summer. There was the table George had chipped his tooth on and there was the spot where Ron had killed his first spider accidentally.

As Ginny looked around at her history, she began to think about her future. Would she always be sitting in the dark rain, hoping Harry would come around the corner?

Then and there, once again catching the raindrops on her eyelashes, Ginny made a promise to herself. It really was time to start living her own life. She was more than just Harry Potter's girl. No, she was Ginny Weasley. She was ready to join this war.

---

The next morning, Ginny woke early. She walked downstairs to find both her parents deep in conversation. The second she stepped into the room, however, they both stopped talking and looked up at her.

"Morning dear!" Her mum said far too cheerfully as she got up and walked to the stove. "Eggs?"

"Sure..." Ginny said suspiciously as she sat down at the table. "What's going on?"

Her dad looked at her, opened his mouth, then closed it.

"Don't lie to me," Ginny warned. "I'm not a little girl anymore."

Mr. Weasley sighed. "That's what we've been afraid of." Then he looked up at her and added, "Ready for the truth?"

Ginny took a deep breath, then responded with, "Ready and waiting."

Her dad put down his fork. "Okay. The Prime Minister has been kidnapped, and Kingsley was found outside of the office... dead."

Ginny gasped and covered her mouth, eyes wide.

"It appears that he put up quite a fight. He tried to send for back-up, but somehow the signal didn't go out."

"No," Ginny whispered.

Mr. Weasley rubbed his temples then continued. "The painting that usually carries news between the two Ministers has been destroyed, and the Prime Minister's office shows no evidence of a struggle. After Kingsley was down, it seemed to be an easy ride."

Ginny looked down at the eggs her mum had just set before her. They swarmed beneath her eyes as tears began to form. She fought them away and looked back up at her dad.

"Are we still going by the truth policy?" He nodded at her. "Okay. Is Hogwarts reopening?"

Mr. Weasley sighed and began to rub the inside corners of his eyes. "No."

This time, Ginny didn't gasp or let out any emotion whatsoever. She simply nodded.

"And what should I do all year?" she asked.

This time her mum answered. "You should stay at home with me. I could use some help around the house."

Ginny shook her head. "No. I'm not going to sit around and do chores with the Dark Lord rising. This year can't be wasted, I need to learn to defend myself and those around me." Her voice was strong and sure, as though she had thought a lot about this before now.

"Actually," Mr. Weasley spoke up, "I think I may have an idea. You could possibly train with Tonks."

"Tonks?" Ginny asked, surprised. "Doesn't she have other things to do?"

"She's – er-- been removed from the field..." Mr. Weasley said awkwardly.

"Why?" Ginny sounded genuinely concerned.

Mrs. Weasley giggled. "They say she's lovesick. Her work's been slipping lately and they say it's because her head's in the clouds." She giggled again before adding, "You two will be a good match."

"I'm not lovesick!" Ginny said, blushing. "I'm perfectly fine."

Her mum snorted and looked away.

"Lessons with Tonks sounds fun," Ginny said to her father, as she shot her mother dirty looks. "When should they start?"

"I can ask Tonks at work today. I'll tell you tonight," Mr. Weasley smiled, before adding, "You really are all grown up, aren't you?"

Ginny's mind guilty flashed to the night before, but she pushed the memory back into her brain. "I guess I am," she said with a small smile.

Mr. Weasley smiled as he stood from his chair, tousling her hair in a way he hadn't since she was a little girl. "Don't grow too fast," he said. "You're our last kid."

Ginny smiled. "I'll try not."

The words would be her curse.

---

That afternoon, Ginny decided to go for a run. She used to run nearly everyday in the summer, but after her third year, she sort of got too busy to make time to run. She loved to, though, because it let her mind wander and she couldn't be interrupted by anyone.

She pulled on a pair of shorts and an old T-shirt of Charlie's, then pulled on the old running shoes that hadn't been worn for a few years. They were a tight squeeze, but she knew they'd stretch out as she ran. She carefully tucked her wand into her shorts, making sure that it wouldn't fall out. Then she pulled her hair into a ponytail and headed out. She stretched first, her muscles feeling sore and unused after so long in rest.

The first few meters were always the worst. Her body ached and screamed at her to stop, but she knew she couldn't. As her muscles got used to the pain, she fell into a steady rhythm. Her feet pounded against the ground and she could feel her pulse, almost in rhythm. The wind beat against her face and she let her thoughts wander out of control. She ran down from the Burrow and towards the Muggle village, happy that no one else seemed to be out so she could be alone. As she ran steadily towards the village, her mind inevitably drifted back to Harry.

She knew that they had left Privet Drive the day of Harry's birthday, and had gone to take their apparation tests. From what she gathered, afterwards they had headed to Godric's Hollow. On the way there, though, they encountered their first Death Eater fight. Six of them had apparated before them about a mile away from Harry's parent's home, and they had fought them as well as they could. Ron had even killed one, though accidentally. He had ducked when the death curse was shot at him and it hit the Death Eater behind him, killing him instantly. It was the first death they would come across on this crazy journey.

After stunning all the Death Eaters and binding them with rope, a group of Aurors appeared to finish the duty. The trio had continued on towards Godric's Hollow uninterrupted. They reached Harry's parent's house early in the morning, and had stayed around that area for nearly a week, without being attacked by Death Eaters. Harry had wanted to stay longer, but Bill's wedding was taking place and they had to return home.

Ginny wasn't sure why no Death Eaters had attacked them while they stayed at Godric's Hollow. She also didn't know why they had stayed there for so long, it seemed dangerous, although she did sort of have an idea. She remembered Harry telling them about Horcruxes, which were a part of Voldemort's soul. He had said something about each of them being formed after a murder he commits. Harry must have thought that he would find a clue to a Horcrux at his parent's house, since that was such a large murder in Voldemort's life.

The thing was, Ginny didn't quite agree. Voldemort wouldn't have had time to make a Horcrux directly after murdering the Potters, because he didn't even get to finish the job. That's where Harry had come in.

Whatever the reason, though, Harry hadn't wanted to leave Godric's Hollow, and she knew that's where they probably were now. She didn't have any idea how long they would be staying there, but she was worried. Because if Harry was on some wild goose chase for these Horcruxes, and he was somewhere where they probably didn't have any, he might be there for a long time, only prolonging the time it takes to kill Voldemort.

Not to mention the time it takes to come back to Ginny.

Ginny had reached the Muggle village by now. Each person she saw reminded her of something new, something she had tried to repress, and as she ran more, she began to cry, her tears mixing in with her sweat.

The man with the long beard made her think of Dumbledore, the death that no one had expected. Harry had told them all that Snape had done it, something Ginny just didn't understand. She didn't think Dumbledore could have made a mistake so large, he couldn't have missed something so huge. Ginny didn't understand it, and she just didn't want to try anymore. It hurt too much.

A young boy ran past her, chasing after a little toad, and it made her smile, thinking of Neville. She hadn't seen Neville for quite some time, and she missed his quirkiness. He always could make her smile with his clumsiness. But then she thought of his parents, such a sad story. Tortured to insanity, not even capable of remembering their only son. And the thought of Neville, trying to hide this from everyone in his life, it just made her want to cry harder. Neville didn't deserve that, no one did.

A man was stopped in front of her, taking a picture of a building across the street, and as she passed him, she smiled again, thinking of Colin. Colin was always so foolish, and he never did too well in classes, but he was so innocent. He saw the good in everyone. Then Ginny closed her eyes, remembering the story in the Daily Prophet a few weeks back. Dennis Creevey was found dead in London, apparently he had been at the park practicing his Quidditch when he got caught in the crossfire during a fight between Death Eaters and Aurors. From what she had gathered, Colin had lost his spirit. She could tell by the picture in the Daily Prophet, for the old happy Colin was replaced with a sad, mundane Colin, frowning and looking away from the camera, his own missing from the spot it usually sat in his hands.

Ginny's eyes were still closed and she ran straight into a man with blond hair and a cruel face. The man glowered at Ginny as she apologize, then simply shook his head and walked off. Ginny was reminded strongly of Malfoy. She felt a hatred surge through her veins at the thought of Malfoy, and it made her want to scream, want to hit something. If Malfoy hadn't gotten those Death Eaters into the school, Dumbledore would still be around and everything wouldn't be so miserable. Harry wouldn't be gone, Hogwarts would be opening in the fall, and everything would be the way it was supposed to be. Malfoy was an asshole, a traitor, and a prat, and Ginny hated everything about him.

As Ginny turned to run back to the Burrow, she realized that all these people had one thing in common. Every single one of them had a horrible, destroyed life because of one person, and one person only. Voldemort had made Snape and Malfoy Death Eaters, Voldemort's followers had killed both the Longbottom's and Dennis Creevey, and it was he who had taken away the man she loved. Voldemort was just a horrible force, out to destroy other people's lives simply because he could.

With each step, she found a new feeling rushing through her body. Sheer anger and hate, all of it directed purely at Voldemort. If he were to appear before her on this road, she would have fought him without a doubt, and she could have won, because just then, she had more hate in her body directed towards him than she knew possible. She could have taken on that asshole.

Ginny ran the rest of the way with one thought keeping her going. Harry was out there, and he would kill Voldemort. It wouldn't change the way things were and it wouldn't bring back those who were dead, but it would prevent more people from joining the list of people dead, and it would save the next generation, so that they didn't need to know such an evil existed.

Ginny slowed to a jog as she got closer to the Burrow, trying to calm down. She didn't want to spend the rest of the day in a fury, so she took deep breaths and thought back to Harry. Somehow, thinking of Harry always made her feel better, no matter what was going on.

Her mum was outside in the garden, and she waved at Ginny. Ginny waved back, but her heart wasn't in it. She had noticed something new, something that made her heart hurt. All the plants in the garden were dying, because of this horrible cold front. They were summer plants, and the weather lately hadn't been summer weather. The sun had been hidden behind clouds for so long that Ginny had forgotten what it looked like outside if it wasn't gray.

The Muggles had blamed the cold on something called 'global warming', but Ginny wasn't buying it. They had blamed the fog last year on that, and she had found that just as ridiculous. She figured both weather patterns were related.

She walked to her mum and sat down on the grass next to her, stretching again.

"Mum, do you think this weather means that the dementor's are done breeding?" Ginny asked as she reached for her toes.

Her mum sighed. "Ginny, you know I don't like talking about this sort of stuff," she looked up, and seeing Ginny's pleading eyes, she gave in. "Yes, I do think it does."

"Do you think they'll be attacking soon?" Ginny quarried. Her voice shook, because the thought of dementor attacks scared her more than any other kind of attack. To be without a soul... she shivered.

Her mum looked uncomfortable, but she answered the question. "Yeah, I think they will. I'm sure we'll be hearing about it in the paper sometime soon."

"What if they attack here?"

Mrs. Weasley looked up, aghast. "Do you really think we'd be foolish enough to not have prepared for that? These wards will keep out all sorts of enemies, dementors included."

"But wards can be broken!" Ginny argued. "You know what happened at Hogwarts, that could happen here!"

"Hogwarts was attacked from the inside. Unless you, me, or your father is a Death Eater, I think we'll be okay," she said with an air of finality, so Ginny dropped it.

"I'm heading inside," she said coldly as she walked away.

She was sick of the way her mother refused to talk about this stuff! As if ignoring it would make it go away. She acted like Ginny was still just a baby and couldn't handle this, but Ginny could handle so much more than she gave her credit for. She just wanted to be treated like an adult for once.

It was harder these days, with her siblings all gone and her father busy at work. She only had her mum for company, and it was getting a bit old. They were arguing more than ever before, and there was so much tension within the house. Ginny wanted to get out, to escape from it all, but she knew she couldn't. She had to stay at home like a good little girl and obey her mother's rules.

She hoped it would get better when Tonks got there. Tonks was always good at clearing tension. Plus, her mum was actually right... Ginny was lovesick, as much as she tried to deny it, and Tonks could help her realize how dumb lovesick looks.

That night, Ginny went to bed with a heavy heart and a filled up head. She was sick of thinking, but with nothing else to do these days, she couldn't escape her thoughts. She dreaded a whole year of just sitting around over thinking everything, she was so sick of sitting around while the world collapsed. She wanted to go out and fight, to go out and do something to help win! But instead she was caught in her house with only her thoughts and her irritable mother.

It took a lot for Ginny to fall asleep that night, but when she eventually did, her body thanked her. It'd been an exhausting few days.

_**A/N:** Sorry it took so long. I went away for a few weeks, but I'm home now. I'll try to update once a week, but the play keeps me busy. And after the play, I'm going to New York for a week or so. So you guys just have to deal._

_My normal site seemed to understand this better, but you guys are having issues it seems so I'll just tell you. The beginning chapter was 2 different flashbacks, sort of a prologue thing. The story actually begins in chapter 2, but the first chapter is just a look at what's to come. The second flashback with Tonks is coming up pretty soon._

_Read, reveiw. Whatever._


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